ANNOUNCEMENTS, SPECIAL EVENTS
- With love and joy we introduce our beautiful baby boy...
- Sweet as candy, good as gold, our precious baby girl Elizabeth, a miracle to hold.
- Christopher joined our family through the miracle of adoption on july 1st.
- We can't believe it's been a year, Sandra's first birthday is already here!
- Our darling little angel was sent from Heaven above. Please celebrate her Baptism and surround her with your love.
- Many miles traveled and a lot of knowledge gained. Come celebrate Mark's graduation.
- We invite you to share our excitement, pride and love when our daughter Rebecca becomes a Bat Mitzvah.
BIRTHDAYS, ANNIVERSARIES
- Come celebrate a birthday for and oldie but a goodie.
- Happy anniversary my love • I am so happy to be married to you.
- Happy Birthday • Hope your day is full of fun and laughter...
- Happy Birthday, Mom • You are the best Mom in the whole world!!
- To Angela, Happy birthday my love!!
- James' Birthday • Better Than Ever at 50!!
BUSINESS, OFFICE, WORK
- Best wishes • Wishing you good luck and success in all you do.
- Congratulations!! • Wow, you completed 5 years with us!!
- You've been working for 5 years with us. • But still feels like we have not known you enough.
- Walter, CEO of Facial Tissue Manufacturing Co., is said to have added pepper to tissues to increase sales.
- Catherine's Contact lens factory temporarily closed after they fell out
- Job experts Dennis Adams found that when cannibals are put in management positions, lots of heads roll...
- Customer of the Year • ABC Enterprise Wins Again!
- Jeffrey buys lunch. • Office closes. • Everyone in Shock!
FAVORITE PETS
- Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes
- Every boy should have two things: a dog, and a mother willing to let him have one.
- Frogs have it easy... They can eat what bugs them!
- Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
- Heather discovers new more dangerous breed of sharks: upper dorsal fin is missing!
HOLIDAYS, CHRISTMAS, MOTHER'S DAY
- Happy Holidays • Merry Christmas and best wishes for the coming year.
- Season's Greetings • Wish you a fun-filled Christmas and a great New Year ahead!
- Dear Mom • Wish you a very happy Mother's day. I am so happy to be your daughter.
- Happy Diwali! • May your Diwali sparkle with joy and happiness!
- It's Easter! Eat whatever you find under the sofa. • Don't waste time wondering Which came first, the marshmallow chicken or the chocolate egg!
- Wish you happy holidays • But don't remain asleep till the last of the holiday season.
- Happy Eid ul-Fitr • May your prayers be heard and may Allah give you peace in your family.
- Warm wishes! • May your Christmas sparkle with joy and happiness!
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HONOR, ACHIEVEMENTS
- Congratulations on you new home • Wish you good luck in the new area.
- Good luck... • Behind you are all your triumphs and achievements. Ahead of you lie new challenges and possibilities.
- Charles Carter invents two-armed bandit slot machines for people to get hugs when they lose.
- Best Sales Team on Earth! Sales Target overshot by 43%
HUMOR, JOKES, GAGS
- Thomas invents two new colors for blind people: light black and dark black.
- Ronald Moore just joined State Police • Mistook skiers wearing ski masks for robbers wearing skis...
- Steven Parker thought he saw a U.F.O. Turns out to be glow-in-the-dark Frisbee.
- Sharon, who lately joined M.A.D.D. (Mothers Against Drunk Diving), reminds us concrete swimming pools are safer if they contain water.
- David & Cynthia say "I do" • Parents sigh with relief!!
NATURE, OUTDOORS, VACATIONS
- A lot of parents pack up their troubles and send them off to summer camp.
- Anthony on ego trip • Due to return in a week.
- Liu Wong negotiating with NASA to deliver take-out to International Space Station
NEWBORN, BABIES
- Congratulations • Adorable feet and cute little hands! Saying hold me, hold me in your arms!!
- Just heard about the little angel that has landed in your nest. Congratulations!!
- Little baby on the way... • Making Frances glow day by day.
- Jennifer Born May 25th • Say Good-Bye To Sleep!
- People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.
- Stephen Matthew born May 22nd at 2:34 am • Welcomed with love.
- Andrew & Diane are excited to announce that Laura & Stephanie have doubled their home's population on January 10, 2008
PARTY, CELEBRATION, WEDDINGS
- To Mom and Dad on your anniversary... • You two make my life so wonderful. Happy anniversary!
- Warm wishes on your wedding • May God bless you with joy and happiness in the tomorrows...
- Ryan & Melissa to marry • Couple of the Year
- Some things are better the older they grow. Antiques, wine and Gerald, that someone special we know!
- Ashley met someone who can cook and do housework... She says she will not hesitate a minute, she will marry him.
SCHOOL, GRADUATION, TEENAGERS
- A graduation is the key to unlock doors of opportunity. Congrats buddy!
- Congratulations on your graduation Julia! • Remember when you close one chapter, the next chapter begins automatically.
- Congratulations Donald! • You are now a graduate. So no fooling around!
- It is always exciting to go back to school, for knowledge knows no bounds.
- Peter, the fun time's over. • The school books are back again.
- Michelle, Classes are over, no more lectures; now go and sleep until you hit a 24/7 job!
- Gook luck George! • On your forthcoming exams.
- Mark Simpson graduates. • Anderson High back to normal!
- Gary Bernardo gets diploma... • Teachers get relief!
- Patrick Brown Graduates... • School Board to investigate!
- Patricia cleans room. • Finds another room!
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RETIREMENT, SENIOR BIRTHDAYS
- Ahh..retirement finally..no more work Harry... sleep all day • But remember you will not have dreams any more, as your dreams have come true.
- Congratulations on your retirement Lori!! • Thank you for all your work. You will be missed.
- All the best Theresa • Life is a big adventure. Seize each moment and make the best of it.
- Congratulations on your retirement Brandon!! • But remember you still have lawn-work to do!!
- Grandma Rose Hits 75 • The Best is Yet to Come!!
- Arthur B. Taylor retires! • Kapricorn Company stock plummets!
- Arthur B. Taylor retires! • Kapricorn Company stock rises!
- Louise, after years of hard work and dedication it's time to take a permanent vacation!
- Little Heather said: "Grandmas are moms with lots of frosting".
- Victor Campbell is retiring... to become his wife's full-time job.
- Raymond H. Miller retires. • Nobody notices!
- Don't play too much golf Howard. Two rounds a day are plenty.
ROMANCE, LOVE, FAMILY
- If I could rearrange the Alphabet, I would put U and I together.
- Samuel and Judy: A perfect match.! • The two of you set an example how a couple should be.
- Congratulations on your engagement Carlos and Irene • Wish you luck in your new life.
- Jacqueline, did I tell you? • That I like you, because you are very special.
- Get well soon Sara • May caring thoughts and warm wishes that come your way; Lift your spirits and brighten your day.
- Having you for a Mom was the best beginning of my life. • Happy Mother's Day with lots of love, Mom!
- I would like to tell you my secrets • "I miss you always"
- Love is in the air. • A celebration of love for you and me! Happy Valentine's Day!!
- Thinking of you today and everyday Jesse. • Hope you bounce back soon!!
- To a wonderful father.. • Sending a hug full of love to a wonderful father. Happy father's day DAD!
- A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be.
- Rachel and Randy, Happy Valentines Day • You're a Special Couple!
SHOW BUSINESS
- Jonathan's heading for Hollywood: "If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it."
- Piano player Douglas Robinson loses his keys...
- It's Show Time! Help me celebrate my 8th Birthday at a Karaoke Party
- Keep the treat ready, or make the night scary!! • Happy Halloween!
SPORTS, LITTLE LEAGUES
- François, Hot dog manufacturer, wins tour de frank.
- Lawrence Bernachez shoots 104 • Caddy faints!
- Edward Hits 82! • President Declares Holiday!
- Juan Garcia gets 1st Hit! • Drafted #1 by Yankees
- Justin catches firts pass • Runs for touchdown
- Baseball, football, tennis, anyone? Lookout Little League, here comes Benjamin, our son!
- Bobby Minkel scores in overtime and Bear Mountain Flames win Little League Cup! • Bobby named Player of the Year!
- Blue Rockets win! • Gerry Mulroney Coach of the Year.
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